It wasn't a perfect storm, but it was damn impressive.

I'm back online after being forced off by torrential downpours, vivid lightning, rolling thunder. I call it TV weather. It's the type of weather you see in movies and TV shows that feature a haunted house, or some disaster flick where the road is flooded out and the heroes have to rescue a dog or an old lady. It's weather you don't see everyday, at least here in the Northeast. I'm sure people in the Midwest and South would beg to differ. I sat on my couch, watching television, and out to window above the set, across the street near the water, I could see real, honest-to-goodness, sky-to-earth lightning bolts! And they stayed in the sky for several seconds. This wasn't hit and run lightning. This stuck around for awhile to let everyone know who's boss. And I don't mean Tony Danza.

For some reason, don't ask me why, I caught myself watching the E! special on plastic surgery (what's so "entertainment" about this I don't know - they weren't even celebs). One guy had a flap of skin transplanted from the side of his head to the front, to cover his baldness. Now he looks like Glen Campbell. One woman has had over a dozen surgeries in order to (and I'm not kidding) look like Barbie. Her reasoning? Because Barbie seems to "have all the friends," not to mention those great outfits and beauty.

I wanted to reach into the television, grab her and scream, "She also seems to be EIGHT INCHES TALL and has a boyfriend with no genitalia!!!"

Some new stuff here at the site: a new poll, and links to a couple of new articles, one on starting your own magazine and the other a review of the June issue of GQ. GQ is one of those magazines that always has a couple of great articles per issue, but also a lot of stuff I can't use. The ads all seem to feature clothing that would fit only tall guys. Guys with abs and girlfriends and bank account amounts so large he doesn't even bother balancing his checkbook every month. But why the hell am I even talking about it when you can read about it here?

Smithereens on the TV right now. They're using "Blood and Roses" in a new commercial. They probably use just the guitar riff, because I doubt the lyrics would fit whatever product they are selling. Unless, of course, it's FTD and they are selling roses, or the National Blood Bank looking for donors.* Odd coincidence: yesterday I bumped into an old girlfriend of mine. We dated, sort of, about 14 or 15 years ago, during my "pizza days" as a cook at the town's best pizza place. Anyway, one night we went out to a local bar to listen to the band, have a couple of beers, have a good time. But there's just so much loud music and beer you can stand before it shifts from "good time" to "wanna go?" As we started to head towards the front door, a melee enveloped her. I tried to grab her, but her hand slipped from mine and she fell into the crowd. Laughing, too, and I guess it was kinda funny. Eventually the bouncers and police broke things up. The next day in the paper I read who had started the fight.

The lead singer of The Smithereens. Yesterday I see her again and today I hear their big hit again, for the first time in years. Strange.

And, oh, the above "perfect storm" reference: the movie of the same name opens Friday. No, I don't have a financial stake in it, but go see it anyway. It was filmed in my hometown, right down the street from my apartment. I'm in the movie, too. But I use my stage name.

"George Clooney."

*I just saw the commerical again. It's for the new Nissan Maxima. No blood, no roses.

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